I love buying gifts. I love giving presents to my kids. It thrills me to see them thrilled, delights me to see them delighted, and tickles my soul to hear them laugh. And our kids will have a great Christmas. Not as great as some, but still a great Christmas. I think it is one of the sweetest privileges of parenthood to get to experience Christmas with kids. I love it.
But I was thinking the other day about the best "gifts" I can give my kids and honestly, none of them can be wrapped. I'm not writing this post to sound like a know it all, got it all figured out parent. Anyone who knows me knows I'm not that! But I have found when I write my intentions down, think them through and discuss them with others, I do better at carrying them out. So in no exact order, these are some of the gifts I want to give my children...
A mother who prays for them everyday.
A mother who prays with them everyday.
Hugs. Every morning. Every night. And as many as I can squeeze in between.
The memory of my face lighting up when they enter a room. (not easy some days!)
I want them to see that I love God.
I want them to see how much I love their Daddy.
Laughter.
Safety.
The knowledge that I will love them no matter what.
A happy childhood.
A healthy work ethic.
A compassionate heart.
Jesus.
The belief that God loves them more than any human ever could and will never abandon them.
An example of faith that chooses to believe even when it does not understand.
A view of the world that encompasses poverty, illness, and tragedy, yet still inspires hope.
Pretty tall order?
Yes!
I admit the wish list I hold in my heart for my kids overwhelms me at times. There are days when it is painfully obvious that I am not worthy of the trust God showed in me when he made me their mother. I am not all that wise, or strong, or disciplined, or patient, or even caring.
Sometimes I think I work harder to give my kids material things because I am not sure how I am doing with the deeper gifts. As hard as it is to afford the latest gadget, it's much easier to buy a Wii than to breed a compassionate heart. I mean really, how do you do that?
Where am I going with this? (Not where I thought when I started!) I guess I am going to the same place every Christ loving parent or child of God goes when the questions get too deep and the tasks at hand seem too big. To the Father. The giver of life. The author of Love and Grace. And I pray that when I fall short, because that is just inevitable, that HE will be there to give my children just what they need. And I believe that HE will. Faith that HE will love and parent my children. That is one of the greatest gifts I have ever received.
As I said, I love gifts!
So I have a gift challenge for you... In this busy "season of giving" I would be most honored if you would give me the gift of your advice or experience in giving or getting some of the unwrapable (is that a word?) gifts I mentioned above in comments. What is one of the best unwrapable gifts you were given growing up?
The greatest gifts are the ones we share... So share already!
Happy gift giving!
four things | twelve (Christmas edition)
1 day ago
Posts
6 comments:
No takers? OK, I will start...
When I was in college I didn't want to let academics get in the way of "the ACU experience." As a result I did not graduate with my class. I felt like the biggest loser. Really I felt awful about myself. I never had problems with academics, I simply just did not do what I should have done to graduate on time. My granddaddy took me aside one day and said "You know Stephanie college is important but a diploma will not get you into Heaven, and the lack of one, or a tardy one, will not keep you out." He went on to say that my life was bigger than my life at ACU and I since I had a whole big life in front of me to live, I best stop beating myself up and get busy making my life what I wanted it to be from that point on. And he was so right. It was a turning point for me.
I don't remember any Christmas present my granddaddy ever gave me, but I will never forget the gift of those words of love, encouragement, and unmerited belief in me at a time when I really needed it. What a gift!
We never had much money growing up but we had tons of family....My parents taught me how important it was to take time for family and to love the simple pleasures that life offers.
The importance of family...being there for each and loving each other no matter what.
Meredith
Maybe it's the pregnancy hormones, but your post makes me want to cry! I too feel like I fall short of what God wants me to be as a parent, and I'm so glad He's there to help me. I'm so glad that there is grace for when we do things wrong!
In my family, I always admired the way my parents loved each other and liked each other, too. I also admired their faith!
Two things I will comment on. No..Three.
First the hugs. I desperately miss hugs from my kids, because they are teenagers and not as cuddly. I almost envy my husband's nightly wrestling session with my son because he gets to "embrace" him.
Second, We allow our kids to see us "kissing in the kitchen" and "dancing in the dining room." They roll their eyes, but we want them to see that marriage is exciting and romantic and fun; and that after 20 years, we still love each other as though we were high school sweethearts (which we were)
Third, when our son made a huge mistake a couple of years ago and we saw the consequences tumble down around us I told him " You messed up, and you must be disciplined; but I have not for one second stopped loving you. I have not for one second stopped being proud to be your mom. You are so much more than this one bad decision. You are going to go through some shame and embarrassment over this; and I am going to walk beside you every step of the way. You cannot hide from this; but I won't hide from it either."
I hope we were able to temper his discipline with mercy and grace. It is a hard balance.
Jacinda
Those hormones do tend to make the tear ducts work overtime! But when it has to do with kids, specifically my kids, it doesn't take much! I got a little misty yesterday just typing that list and I AM NOT PREGGERS!
HW
I think it is great for kids to see their parents kissing in the kitchen! And standing by your son is the best gift you could have ever given him!
Parenting is wonderful, but it is also heart wrenching and hard. I think it helps to hear that others who we admire and worship with acknowledge that parenting is hard work...wonderful, precious,life- changing, HARD work that we would never trade or wish away!
I read where a family was postponing their Christmas trip to Disney to take their teenagers to the Pacific Northwest to help with the clean up. If the kids are game, I think that is the kind of thing I want to do with my kids when they are a little older.
Why are we not hearing more about the tragedy that has hit that area so hard? It is almost as bad as Katrina 16,000 homes flooded possibly destroyed... yet I couldn't even find it on the news yesterday. How is that?
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