How long has it been since I blogged? OH. MY.
Since I never blog and no one really reads this anymore I feel pretty safe just thinking "on blog" tonight. Here are a few thoughts... (well, 8 to be exact)
1. The Panther Patch is almost finished. I love working on it. I am thrilled to see it all come together, love having kids out there planting, love organizing it and imagining all that can be done out there. Really love it. But I also feel like it is killing me. I feel like I have no energy, no brain, and no time left for anything else. As a wife and mom of 3, that is bad. Very bad. But I can not quit now. I'm almost done! (I've been telling myself that for two months) Please remind me never to work this hard on a project unless A. I am getting paid really well or B. It is for my own yard/house/kids.
2. I want to move. I really do. I just want to move. Across town or across the state.(OK, just across town!) I have moving fever. I am addicted to realtor.com and the tax appraisal district web site. We have been in this house 7 years. Is it possible to have the 7 year itch with a house? I love my house, but I still want to move it, add on to it, get a totally different yard and remodel 70% of it. Moving would be easier than all that. So I want to move. AND I WANT TO MOVE NOW!
3. Reality check. We are no where close to being ready to move. Moving will be hard. We have so much to do to get this house market ready... but honestly, it is not anything that we should not be doing anyway just for us to live here. I'm ready to try. What do we have to loose? It's not like we have to move, so we don't have to sell unless the price is right. I think I have almost talked Rob into getting serious about this. So as soon as the Panther Patch is finished, getting the house "market ready" begins. No rest for the weary!
4. I am a terrible blogger. I just don't want to blog. I don't know why. (Actually I have been blogging...you guessed it.. for THE PANTHER PATCH! Yeah. Just go over there if you need a Steph fix. That is usually where I am.) I don't know if it is facebook or what, but I can not seem to get in the blogging groove anymore. Remember the days when we blogged everyday or every other day? WOW. That was a long time ago! :)
5. During all this crazy busy life, my kids are growing so fast and changing so much every day that I can't stand it. It makes my head spin. Ella Kate, Rhett and Kolby have all 3 changed so much this school year! I have not been good at documenting it either. Sometimes I wonder who these big kids are and what have they done with my babies? I mean there are these little people who live here and say and do the funniest things. They think the biggest thoughts. They can bring out the strongest of every emotion in me and I love them so much that it hurts. It blows me away. EVERY DAY! And it goes so fast in retrospect! How do these LONG days add up so quickly into fleeting months and years? How do I slow it down? Do you ever think these things? This seems to be a constant theme in my life the last few years. I am beginning to sound like an old woman aren't I? ACK!!!
6. I miss people. I miss the friends I never see anymore because our circles don't cross. I miss my out of town friends. I miss my San Angelo, ACU and Fort Worth friends. I feel like an awful friend for not keeping up with anyone better. My calendar and mind are both so full that there is never time to see anyone for long. But my heart really longs to sit and visit, to linger, to laugh until I snort, to have so much to talk about that my body denies the need for sleep because my mind and heart are so full. I want to play games and and laugh so loud that the kids can't sleep in the next room and strangers would swear we were drunk from the sweet tea we are drinking. I MISS THAT!
7. I would love to sit here and blog about me longer :) but I actually need to do a few things before I crash for a few hours and start another crazy day tomorrow. The house looks like it threw up on itself. Should I really try to put everything away or should I just walk around with a trash bag and take it all to Goodwill in the morning. ALL OF IT! Would we really miss all this stuff so much?
OK off the computer I go. 1 2 3 and I'm off...
BTW
8. Happy Mothers Day!
four things | twelve (Christmas edition)
21 hours ago
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6 comments:
Your #5 and #6 impacted me more than I think I can say in words here, right now. But - I'll try.
You described my life and my children as they grew up. Wow.
Then you moved on and described my life right now. The emotions that have been coming and going in waves recently - had no words - until you posted this.
We don't know each other. I guess I am technically a blog stalker.
In any case, Thank you.
Vicky
Welcome! You can't very well stalk a blog that only gets published once a month, so we'll just call you a blog FOTW (fly on the wall) :)
It makes me happy to think any of my thoughts struck a chord with someone. Isolation is a huge tool in the devils arsenal. It's so much harder to deal with things alone. The funny thing is, in reality we are seldom ever alone in any of our thoughts, no matter how we feel about them. Blogging is good for reminding me of that!
1. I will remind you....if you tell me ahead of time. I worry you do too much. Is it okay that I say that? Maybe I do too little at/for the school so I'm not the perfect person to preach "appropriate time" to give. But you can't keep on that hard. Take care of Stephanie a little bit.
2. I don't enjoy moving. But I can understand the "itch." Once you get it, it's always on the mind.
3. I'm going to work on my real estate license this summer. So when you do decide to scratch that itch, keep me in mind. ;)
4. I gave up my personal blog a long time ago. I think about starting it back up all the time. But then.....I don't. LOL I understand.
5. O.M.G. I know. It goes by frighteningly too fast. I start counting years untikl they "leave me" and it makes me cry. Literally.
6. O.M.G. again. I miss playing games, talking and laughing so hard that it hurts. When we get our pool cleaned up and ready, let's have a mom's only "visit poolside and laugh til it hurts" night. Deal?
7. Sabrina had a MAJOR "behavior problem" with a filthy room at the center of it all about 2 months ago. I "went off" in my own way. I told her to go with her Dad. Away from the house. Now. She'll love her clean room when she gets home. I bagged up probably 7 huge garbage bags full of whatever was on her floor. Not to throw away. Just to take away. For however long. Clothes, toys, books....whatever. Hid them. She asked once or twice where her things were. Then never again. She doesn't miss it. She doesn't even know what's in there. Neither do I. I'll look sometime. In my spare time. LOL Point is.....way too much of our junk in life...is really junk.
8. Happy Mo Day to you as well! Special prayers to those looking at their 1st Mother's Day without their Mothers.
Shannon~
1. Yes you can say that! :)
3. I'll keep that in mind. What do you know about house trading?
4. The blog you do keep is such a blessing do so many!
6. Count me in!
7. I know. We would not miss it. So why is it so hard for me to do that?
8. I was thinking about you and your Mom the other day. i know this is a hard one for you! I hope missing her will eventually give way to joy in knowing you had a great Mom and she is finally home! Happy Mother's Day to you!
:) So glad we have all this technology to keep us connected since we live a whooping 3 miles apart! LOL
I remember how we all used to blog at least once a day and think of things that were "Blog Worthy". I either have much less time or much less interest. I think I know which!
Miss you!
You and I are so much alike!
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