Rita?

I tend to talk to strangers and can strike up a conversation with just about anyone. Not long ago I was talking to a mom at Burger King whose husband owns a business that uniquely serves the community and allows him a very handsome living. However it is one of those jobs most of us wouldn't do for all the gold in Fort Knox. He owns a highly specialized cleaning company that cleans up after murders, suicides, and other freaky accidents. Only the coroner and police have his number. He doesn't advertise. Last night I was wishing that I had bothered to catch that woman's name and get her number....

Kolby has a stomach virus. We didn't know that when she went to bed last night. Kolby is also known for sleep walking around her room. Last night she evidentially starting puking and walking at the same time. By the time I found her at 11:30 pm there was not a clean surface left in her room or bathroom and she was still not fully awake. I would have gladly mortgaged the house again to pay someone else to clean it up! But since I was afraid the smell would kill us all by morning and since I don't have that guy's number, I donned my rubber gloves and lysole, stuffed Kleenex up my nose (so I wouldn't contribute more to the mess) and just did it. At least started it anyway. YUCK! What was I saying about loving motherhood last week?

Kolby apologized a million times, poor little thing. I've never seen a human throw-up as much as she did from 11:30 to 1:45 am. The phenergan finally kicked in around then and we both got to sleep for a few hours. Rob, who slept through the whole thing, actually tried to wake me up to go wake Kolby up for school today. Turns out he never heard a thing and didn't notice the pile of stuff in the garage left to launder today. Maybe fatherhood has more perks than I realized.

Things are looking better today, well everything but the house. Kolby feels better and is religiously following Dr.Kemper's Sprite and peach syrup stomach settling routine. Rhett has decided he wants to go hang out with his Aunt Sari across the street. I am about to go finish the rescue and recover phase of the clean-up and begin demolition. (I'm afraid a few stuffed animals are not going to make it!)We're calling this stomach virus "Rita" after a similar, albeit much more devistating storm, and praying the clean up doesn't take too long. HAPPY FRIDAY!

26 days and the 8th Birthday party!

Just a quick update...
I went to the doctor Tuesday and all went great. In fact I was in and out so fast that I had to call Rob to turn around and go back to work. He missed it again! But in a short 26 days we will have our sonogram and get to see the baby!!! I am so excited to find out what this baby will be. And yes, Rob finally caved to the pressure of three against one (I let the kids vote this time, as I often do when they are on my side:) and we are finding out! So far the heart rate has been 160 and 150. Some say that means girl, some say that means nothing. My gut still says girl but just barely. If I really think about it...Well I have no idea. :) Only 26 day until we find out! :)

And in other news, I am at a total loss as what to do for Kolby's birthday which is a week from tomorrow! I have never waited this long to pull a party together. The last 7 parties have been really good. I'm at a total loss! Kolby has whittled her list from 30 to 20. 20 kids! And honestly between church, school, neighbors, basketball friends, and the friends her mother makes her invite, 20 really is her bare bones list.

One thing I have decided is that birthday parties are way too expensive. Seriously! Everything I have called about is $10 to $15 PER CHILD!!!! And by everything I mean bowling, skating, beading, cooking, painting, pottery making, indoor playgrounds, museums= EVERYTHING!!! And that isn't even all inclusive. I wondered why so many parents have braved slumber parties this year, and I think I just figured it out! I don't want to do a slumber party, but I am running out of options. ANY IDEAS WOULD BE APPRECIATED.

Have a great weekend blog family!

Shower quandary

Today I am making a dessert to take to the baby shower of a person I do not know. I don't think I have ever even seen her. But her family is relatively new to our church, she just had her fourth baby and is soon scheduled to have open heart surgery. She also works full time and helps take care of her brother-in-law who has been in bad shape after almost dieing a few years ago. I think this girl deserves a shower!!!

At first when approached about this I thought that since I didn't know her I would bow out of this one...But then I got to thinking about some things Val has mentioned in his blog and some things Rob and I have talked about as of late. If my making a dessert and giving $10 towards a gift brightens her day or lessen her load...Well to me it seems that is the least I can do, stranger or not. The girls hosting the shower don't have lots of extra to give. I don't even think they know her that well. They just saw a need. Truly how often does that happen in our lives?

Does it ever seem we heap gifts and blessing on those who have more than they ever need anyway and sort of look the other way when those who truly have need aren't in our circle? Some of the biggest, most well attended showers I have helped host or attended have been for some of my wealthiest friends. Some of the smallest least attended showers have been for some of the people who I know economically needed it the most. What does that say about us as people, or as a church community or as a society?

At my church there is a big thing about not putting baby showers in the bulletin unless it is THE FIRST BABY! There are no exceptions to this rule and despite the pleas of at least two ministers on two different occasions, the policy is hard and fast. I think it is a very snotty policy that leaves people out, makes it very hard and expensive to include everyone and takes away one of the our best ways to bring ladies together for fellowship and to honor and support new moms. When I moved to Midland and Southlake I made a point to go to all the baby showers I could. I read about these showers in the bulletin and showed up whether I knew the person or not because I wanted to get to know people.

Since we moved here, I have helped host at least a dozen showers.. Most all for 2nd or even 3rd babies. Without fail we have accidentally left someone out or hurt feelings because we did not send someone an invitation. It hard not to exclude someone in a church with over 350 ladies on the role! It also makes it hard to have showers for people who are new and don't know who to invite. I wonder what this says to a new mom moving to our congregation? Or a mom who has never had a shower here? Or a mom who isn't plugged in enough to know dozens of people to invite? It would be so much easier if the church would just give a few lines in the bulletin to announce the showers. Not to just pick on my church here because I think all of have our own "snotty" policies when it comes to showers and giving in general.

After reading over this I am afraid my friends are going to think this is my way at hinting that I want a shower...But it truly is not. This is not really about me at all. It is just an example of a way I think we as Christians put boundaries where there should not be boundaries and just try to stay in our comfortable little bubble of friends and traditions. I want to do better at including people, and at least at church, giving with out prejudice when I see a need. It's going to be hard for me I confess. I'm really proud of the girls throwing this shower tonight and the ones who always help give no matter who is receiving. I want to be more like them. I'm starting tonight with $10 bucks and a a bowl of Chocolate Eclare Pudding. Wish me luck.

A Little Kick & some Mommy Mush

Sorry to turn this into a pregnancy blog but I am what I am.

Last night at Wendy's in the middle of saying something to a friend, I felt it! The very first little kick! It caught me off guard and mid-sentence I said "I just felt a kick." OK truth be told I have been sort of nervous because I had not felt anything other than a few uncertain flutters up until now. I'm 16 weeks and felt my first kick with Rhett around 13/14 weeks. With Kolby it was more in the 18/20 week time frame, but I didn't know what to feel then. So anyway, I have been praying for kicks!

Call it that horrible post-miscarriage paranoia or just natural mommy worry, but I almost rented one of those little Doppler things last week so I could listen for the heart beat when ever I wanted to prove that there is really someone in there growing and doing OK. At any rate, I was really excited to feel that first little kick. Yes, it could have been a weird muscle spasm but it happened again 10 minutes later, so I choose to believe it was a kick! YAY!!!!

In other Mommy news, I don't know if I am feeling guilt because Rhett won't be my baby anymore, or if he is just in a very charming, cute stage, but I find myself completely tickled and enamored by my little boy. Friday we had a date night because Kolby was at a birthday party and Rob was reffing a basketball game. We went to "Buzz-o-lees"(Fazzoli's for the rest of you who don't speak Rhett) and to Toys-R-Us for a survey trip. ("Just looking" trips are "survey trips" in our house.) We finished the night off with a few rounds of Memory and Guess Who and root beer floats.

Afterwards, Rhett wanted to sleep in my bed. Rob and I have an unwritten rule about kids sleeping in our bed, we don't do it. So I told him that I would snuggle in his bed with him for a little while. Mid-snuggle, Rhett told me that when his Daddy got really old like Nana and died, he would sleep in my bed with me. I sort of laughed and told him by then that he would be married to his own wife and live in his own house in his own bed with her.
"But I want to marry you."
Very flattered and perhaps a bit misty eyed I said "You can't marry me Rhett, I'm your Mommy."
"Can I marry someone just like you?" (Did I mention that he is the sweetest little boy in the whole wide world!?)
"Of course you can!"
It melted my heart!!! Don't worry, I won't hold him to the sweet sentiments of a four year old when he's in his twenties. But it is conversations like that one that I will hold in my heart forever! I love being a Mom!

Happy Monday!

Stephanie Secret #3

The other day I drove through Schlotsky's and ordered a water and a bag of Salt & Vinegar Chips. "That's all?" the girl asked. "That's all!" I answered. I got some really odd looks when I picked my order up at the window. After the chips were gone, I kept the bag in the car for a day so I could smell it! Let the cravings begin...

Dreams

In the last few nights I have ...

...Given birth to a 9lb. 7 oz baby girl who accidently "slipped out" during a monthly doctors check up. She was born dressed in a pink dress and bonnet and I begged the doctor to put her back in so Rob wouldn't miss her birth. Seems he was playing golf and counldn't be reached.

...Tried to kill a crazy senior citizen who kept saying she would kill me and eat my kids if I didn't kill her first. I tried many methods to no avail.

...Fallen asleep by the side of a river and been swept away by a sudden flash flood to a country where I knew no one and they could not understand a word I said though I knew exactly what they were saying.

...Visited a friend from high school in her new home and discovered she had a blue tiled bathroom that had two twin double decker bath tubs and showers combinations and lots of strangers were bathing in her house.

....Rescued my children from being swept away while they were driving down the street in front of the house I grew up in a silver ride-on truck in the middle of sudden flash flood. (Have I metioned we are in the midst of a drought?)

... Married the wrong guy becasue I thought he was Rob and spent the rest of the night trying to convince Rob and all our friends that it was an accident and I wanted an annulment so I could marry Rob.

... Lived naked on the roof.

... Eaten all the food for Kolby's school's winter dinner on accident (they are expecting a record 350 people) but couldn't fit in the van to drive to Outback to get more because I was too big from eating all the food.

Of course they were all dreams. Prego dreams. Crazy prego dreams! I have had them every pregnancy, but I think this time they have hit a new level of oddness and terror. Yet still, though I know I will toss an turn in turmoil all night , I am so tired I can't wait for my head to hit the pillow.

I wonder how the people of the Bible knew God was talking to them in their dreams. I might have just thought it was bad olive oil or sour fruit or something if he had come to me in a dream.

Well that is as deep as it gets today folks! Happy Wednesday!

Monday, Monday

This our first Monday in school since the holidays. I think it is really nice of MISD to ease back into the year that way!:) I used to despise Mondays when I was in school and when I worked, but as a stay home Mom they aren't so bad. In fact I sort of enjoy getting back into the swing of another week.

Today my sister comes home from Detroit. She has been gone since before Nana died. Auto shows are fun when you are in a great city and the crowds aren't too bad. Neither of those things can be said about Detroit. It is the big MAMA of all US Auto Shows and it is a hard, long show to work. I think Sari had fun but I know she is ready to be home and we are ready to have her back.

Yesterday was another prego sick day. Unlike most sick days, I was sick in the morning and fine by last night. The sick days are getting fewer and farther apart, which is a great sign. I think the hormones are in high gear though as I am crying at Hallmark commercials and having the most crazy dreams! Just another part of the prego journey.

Yesterday afternoon I ventured to SAMS for the essentials (toilet paper, detergent and milk) with Kolby and Rhett while Rob attended his referee meeting. When we drove over the bridge that is supposed to span the Brazos river, THE RIVER WAS GONE!!!! There was just a big brown empty channel with little puddles here and there.

In an almost panic I called Rob and said "The river is gone!"(Like he had anything to do with it, or could bring it back! ;) He explained that if I ever read the paper I would have known that they closed up the dam last week because the lake is getting dangerously low. So no river! The kids and I were pretty upset about the ducks but Rob assured us that they have all flown south for the winter. I let the kids believe that but I don't think these are all flying south type ducks. Then Rhett brought up all the fish, turtles, and occasional snakes we see in the river. Rob assured him that they all went with the water downstream... again, I'm not so sure. ( I had dead fish nightmares last night!) We love to go to the river and feed the ducks and fish. The river is such a pretty part of Waco! I want our river back! So we are all praying for rain harder than ever before...And in other news...

Yesterday morning I awoke to the strangest sound. Little drops of water were hitting the window. It was the strangest thing. Someone said it was rain. I don't quite remember what rain is, but I am so grateful for that heavenly moisture from above. Today the sun is back. But I hope that "rain" comes to visit us again really soon!

Have a great day blog world!!!

Confession and Prayers

The last few days I have been praying hard for somethng Rob and I both hope will happen. I mean I have been praying non-stop for this thing to work out. Then I read Brandon's blog yesterday. I followed the link to Russel Heil's blog. I read the obituary in the Fort Worth paper. Then I felt really silly for putting so much energy into praying for this thing to work out. There are people in this world who need God so badly and need our prayers so fervently.
Though I never knew Kari Heil, I can not stop thinking about her family and those precious little girls. My prayers are taking on a totally different form today. I feel humbled and selfish for bothering God hourly for the last few days with my request. It's so easy to get caught up in myself and forget that there is a whole big world out there that needs God and needs us to care about them. With a bit of guilt I confess that God has blessed me far beyond what I deserve and I aspire to be more of a blessing to others. How can I even think of asking God for more? It's not all about me, or Rob, or our kids. It's not all about what happens in my world but what is happening in HIS world. Please join me in praying for the Heil/Firestone family today, and in the weeks and months ahead.

Stephanie Secret #2

If you put carrot & parsnip peels and celery strings down the dipose-all don't be surprised to find a peel filled waterfall cascading from the cadinets under the sink onto your favorite fluffy houseshoes.

AND don't make homemade chicken noodle soup before 8am because you just might forget to add the chicken.

So how was your day?

The hippo and the turtle

NAIROBI (AFP) - A baby hippopotamus that survived the tsunami waves on the Kenyan coast has formed a strong bond with a giant male century-old tortoise, in an animal facility in the port city of Mombassa, officials said. The hippopotamus, nicknamed Owen and weighing about 300 kilograms (650 pounds), was swept down
Sabaki River into the Indian Ocean, then forced back to shore when tsunami waves struck the Kenyan coast on December 26, before wildlife rangers rescued him.
"It is incredible. A-less-than-a-year-old hippo has adopted a male tortoise, about a century old, and the tortoise seems to be very happy with being a 'mother'," ecologist Paula Kahumbu, who is in charge of Lafarge Park, told AFP. "After it was swept and lost its mother, the hippo was traumatized. It had to look for something to be a surrogate mother. Fortunately, it landed on the tortoise and established a strong bond. They swim, eat and sleep together," the ecologist added. "The hippo follows the tortoise exactly the way it follows its mother. If somebody approaches the tortoise, the hippo becomes aggressive, as if protecting its biological mother," Kahumbu added. "The hippo is a young baby, he was left at a very tender age and by nature, hippos are social animals that like to stay with their mothers for four years," he explained.

Just goes to show, one is never too old to be a "mother" :)

Rainy days and Mondays...

ARE WONDERFUL! Despite what Karen Carpenter sang all those years ago, this is one rainy day, rainy Monday even, that I am thoroughly enjoying. We need it to rain hard for days and days to end this drought, but we are still appreciative of the occasional sprinkles and promising grey skies overhead today.

My kids slept past 9AM this morning! HALLELUJAH! We are having a very lazy MLK day around here. It is probably the calm before the storm. Tomorrow Rhett heads back to school for the first time since December. Poor little guy had strep throat last week and had to miss both days of Mothers Day Out. So tomorrow will be our first normal day since before the holidays. It has been a nice break, but it's time to get back down to business.

More good news...I haven't puked in three days! That is a bit of a record! I am starting to feel less nauseated but wondering if I will ever get my energy back? I need all that energy because I have a very long list of major reorganization projects to tackle. I get tired just thinking about it all! I also have the very lofty goal of bringing Rhett's baby book up to date before next July. It is a lofty goal because Rhett hasn't been born in his baby book yet! It's a bit overwhelming, so I'm trying to trick myself into starting with out thinking about it too much. So far that isn't working!

The hardest part of of having a third so far is that life keeps on trucking with the other two no matter what. For instance, if I am puking and feeling really green, Kolby still has to be at basketball practice. No matter how much I would love to do nothing but clean out and reorganize every inch of this house for the next few months, I still have a four year old who needs to get to have play dates, lunches at Burger King, and the occasional morning at the zoo. Going through "nesting mode" with two already in the nest is a bit more challenging. Of course there is also twice the excitement and anticipation for this baby so I guess it balances out.

Kolby and Rhett are still so excited! Last night just before bed Rhett came and laid his head in my lap. I asked him if he was tired. "No, I'm just trying to see if I can hear the baby." We are all ready for the "kick and moving belly" stage! Today Kolby was dancing around the living room with he biggest smile on her face. I said that she seemed to be in an extra good mood and asked if it was because she got a day off of school. She said "No, I'm just happy to be alive and happy that there is going to be a baby living here in a few months." Can't argue with that! We're all smiles and full of anticipation!

Rob is going to take some comp. time this afternoon and come home early. He has some big things going on at work and is really excited about all that. I'm prayerful and hopeful over all the opportunities that have come his way lately. He works so hard that I relish anytime he gets to be home and relax a bit!

So that is where we are...Just living a plain old mundane yet still a wonderful and active life. Blogging may have to take a back burner to nesting, cleaning, scrapbooking and just plain living for a while, but I will be around! Have a great MLK day blog world! :)

A time to mourn

Warning ~ If you wanted something cheery or funny this may not be the blog for you today.
I sat down to type a post several times over the last few days but ended up going away in tears or deleting it all. There is so much to say that I don't know what to say. Forgive me while I think "on-line" and type a few thoughts out.

Nana's death, the trip to Coleman, and the sweet funeral and burial that followed opened a floodgate of memories and emotions. It is hard to explain. I find myself rejoicing for her passing yet truly mourning her. The tears come unexpectedly and often and usually there is a little laughter in the mix. Nana Ruth was such a huge part of my life growing up. The first 27 years of my life my grandparents were seldom more than 75 miles away and I saw them often.

Nana and Grandaddy had a huge role in determining who I am. I was their first grandchild. I'm the only grandchild Nana ever had to spank. (Even though she regretted it later, I know it was probably deserved.) I was not what they were expecting. My Mom and Aunt were dark haired, dark eyed, babies with well defined features. I was born with "peach fuzz" for hair, chunky all over and had very blue eyes. I was not quiet and demure like my mother. I played with matches, climbed trees and scaled the kitchen cabinets. I was known to take myself for walks around the block at age two and try to cook on the stove at age three. I always wanted to go, go, go , and I talked...A lot. I was a handful.

But Nana and Grandaddy didn't seem too shocked or put out with me. In fact I loved being with them and just took for granted that they liked having me around. I loved spending days by myself in Coleman. I loved when they came to Angelo for their doctors appointments. I still remember sitting in the front yard for what seemed an entire afternoon waiting for their car pull into our driveway. I usually cried when they left, even though it would probably be just be a week or two until I saw them again. At an early age I realized my grandparents were special. I have many memories of Nana telling Grandaddy "Caskey we have the best daughters and the best grandkids...How did we ever get so lucky." We were really the lucky ones and we knew it.

Nine years ago this March my Grandaddy died. My Nana was never the same. I'm not sure any of us have been. After Grandaddy, Nana seemed to loose a part of her spunky self. The dementia crept in and eventually robbed her of most of her short term memory. My parents moved to Coleman hoping to keep Nana in her house. They realized a year or so later that they needed help so they all moved to Waco. After a nasty fall into a plate glass cabinet door, we knew that no house would be safe for Nana.

Nana lived in an assisted living center for a while but it wasn't enough for her. Every two or so years since we moved Nana to Waco's newest, nicest care facility. Each facility got better as Nana got worse. I blocked out so much of what was happening then with Nana. I tried to become emotionally numb but the first time she didn't realize who I was, it broke my heart. I stopped going to see her very often because it was so hard on her and me. She once followed me to the door crying and begging me to take her. I never went by myself again. It was easier to live with the guilt of not seeing her than to live with the painful reality that Nana wasn't Nana anymore. That was how it was for several years. Then last Thursday it looked as though the end was near and we all went to say goodbye.

Late that night my cousin and I were alone with just our Moms and Nana. At one point Mom said she thought Nana said my name. When I bent over her bed to talk to her (she couldn't hear very well) she opened her eyes and looked at me and said "There she is!" It was loud and clear enough for everyone in the room to hear. It truly pierced my heart to see that my grandmother not only knew me, but seemed really glad I was there. For just a breif second, she was my Nana again and I was her beloved first grandchild. That moment is a precious gift I will cherish always. Nana went to sleep less than an hour later and, as far as we know, never woke up again.

There is still a lot to process, but above all I am happy Nana is home. I am glad she is with my Grandaddy and so many other loved ones who passed on years ago. I'm glad my Mom and Aunt don't have to see their mother that way anymore. I'm glad we can let the last nine years go and remember the good times, because there were so many! But still it is hard to think that I will never see my Nana this side of heaven again. I'll never hear her sweet voice or catch a glimpse of that mischievous twinkle in her eye. After years of trying not to think about Nana, I find these past few days that I can think of little else. I guess that is what you do when one of your favorite people in the world dies.

I thank God that Ruth and Caskey Livingston were my grandparents! I hope and pray I can live up to and pass on the legacy of love and Christian servanthood that they left for me and my family to follow. My family has shared so much laughter over the past days remembering our grandparents. And there have been tears, mostly sweet tears of goodbye. My Mom and Aunt are doing as well as they can be expected to do. I know we will all be just fine soon. This is just our time to mourn.

Back

Just got home! It has been a fast and furious few days with little sleep involved, but it is over. The funeral was very sweet and just what I think Nana would have wanted... Actually she would blushed and told us that we were too sweet and been very embarrassed! It's so good to finally remember past the alheimers/dementia that took her away so many years ago! I miss her but am so happy she is finally home!

Anyway, it's all been a blur. A good, sentimental, memory filled blur. Thanks for your prayers and well wishes.I'm posting the Obit from the San Angelo paper today below. There is no way to sum up a life in a few paragraphs!


RUTH WHITAKER LIVINGSTON
Publication Date: January 9, 2006

COLEMAN — Ruth Whitaker Livingston, 96, longtime Coleman resident, formerly of San Angelo, died Saturday, Jan. 7, 2006, in Waco, Texas. Funeral service will be at 11 a.m. Monday, Jan. 9, at the Elm Street Church of Christ with Rick Hagelstein officiating. Burial will follow in the Coleman City Cemetery.
Ruth Whitaker was born Sept. 15, 1909, in Gail, Texas, in Borden County to Robert Hamilton Whitaker and Hettie Kincaid Whitaker. After graduating from San Angelo High School, she attended San Marcos State College and San Angelo Junior College. She then worked for Ted Brown and Associates until her marriage on Aug. 31, 1941, to Thomas Caskey Livingston in San Angelo. She became a loving wife and later mother and grandmother. The couple celebrated 56 years of marriage before Caskey’s death on March 27, 1997.
Ruth and Caskey spent most of their married years in Coleman raising their girls and being involved in church and community activities. In 2000, Ruth moved to Waco to be near her daughters and their families.
Surviving are Ruth’s two daughters and sons-in-law, Mary K. and Corydon Elliot of Hewitt and Thomasue and Rick Hagelstein of China Spring; one brother and sister-in-law, Robert Hugh and Jayne Whitaker of Abilene; six grandchildren, Stephanie Elliot Grosz and husband Rob of Hewitt, Ashley Hagelstein Sanders and husband David of China Springs, Robby Hagelstein and wife Maria of Hewitt, Amber Hagelstein Russell and husband James of Hewitt, Sari Elliot of Hewitt and Aubin Hagelstein of China Spring; eight great-grandchildren, Kolby and Rhett Grosz, Samantha, Scarlett and Suzanne Sanders, Justin and Whitney Hagelstein, and Kelton Russell; two nephews, Bo Whitaker and Bill Whitaker, both of Abilene; special friend Lillie Rice, who became like a third daughter; and numerous other relatives and friends.
Stevens Funeral Home

My Nana

Thursday night we got a call that Nana might be taking her last breathes. Her O2 saturation was low and they said at times they couldn't tell if she was still alive. I was at Kolby's basketball practice with two of my first cousins. We left together for the nursing home.

When we got there Nana was surrounded by her two daughters and son-in-laws and all six of her grandchildren, and her friend, sitter and care-taker for the last six years, Lilly. Then she rebounded. She became more alert. For the first time in a long time she seemed to know who we were. She started breathing more normally and her 02 levels rebounded. She even said a few understandable words. We were all able to say goodbye knowing Nana knew us. It was a specail for time for our family.

Nana went to sleep around midnight Thursday night never to rouse again. She died this morning at 2:00am. I am so glad she has finally left behind the shell of a life alheimers left her with to go to an incredible everlasting life in Heaven! To quote a family friend, I bet Nana was so suprised to wake up in the arms of Jesus! We rejoice for her and celebrate the special wife, mother, sister, daughter, grandmother, aunt, friend and life-long, faithful Christian woman she was! I am sure I will post more about my Nana in weeks to come. For now it is just wonderful to know that for the first time in almost 9 years, my Nana is happy!

The funeral will be in Coleman, Texas at the Elm Street Church of Christ at 11:00am on Monday. The arrangements are being handled by Stevens Funeral Home in Coleman.

In-Vince-ible

I won't pretend to be a huge football fan. I only root for Texas when they are playing out-of-staters or occasionally the Raiders. But last night I about had a heart attack watching the Rose Bowl! What a game! WOW!!! Rob was laughing at me getting so into the game. I was hollering at the TV, gasping every time Texas missed a first down and mentally willing Vince Young to run those last yards to a National Championship...And he did! AMAZING! Congratulations to all the true Texas fans in my life, including the one snoring The Eyes of Texas across the room! I am so happy for Mack Brown and all his staff and players. Texas never gave up and that is why they won. After a long drought, Texas is finally home to the National Champions. HOOK"EM HORNS!!!
Now if the Cowboys could only get a quarterback like Vince Young... Maybe I'm a closet football fan after all! :)

The Heartbeat

My Mom went with me to my doctors appointment today. Dr R said everything looks good and I have again lost a few pounds. I guess being sick and nauseated over the holidays does have a perk! We also heard the heartbeat. I love that sound! There really is a little someone way down in there somewhere! AMAZING! I think Rob is a little sad he missed it, but since this was his first morning back at work since the 22, I didn't want him to have to leave for a doctors appointment. There will be many, many more appointments for Rob to go to. It was fun to have my Mom there and to introduce her to Dr. R. He is a great man and Doctor.

We talked a bit today about pregnancies after miscarriages. Dr R said it is always normal for pregnant women to worry because the emotional and perhaps hormonal side often overtakes the logical side. Having a misscarriage just adds a whole lot of education and therefore fuel to the natural worry every mother feels. I know that, but it is nice to have a doctor who understands. He also said that all I can to do is take care of myself, live as healthy as I can, and then give it to God. I knew that too, but again, it was good to hear my Doctor say it! Dr R even said if I get nervous I am welcome to call and swing by to hear the heartbeat. I doubt I will because I am actually feeling pretty good about things, but it is nice to know that I can! :)

So far I really like 2006!

Last Post of 2005

2005
What a year!
Good to us in so many ways, but not with out it's stressful moments.
Here is a recap that will be of no particular interest to anyone but me, although you are more than welcome to read along. :)

We rang the New Year in with the promise of a new career path for Rob. In the months of January and February I realized what a toll the bank had taken on my husband. Who knew those worry lines weren't etched in his brow permanently! It was a great start to the new year.

My friend Shae and I spent the first two weeks of the New Year doing a Trading Spaces, While You Were Out redo of the Teachers lounge at Kolby's school. It was hard work but well worth it! I have never received so many thank you notes in my life, and the personal thanks I still get TO THIS DAY, make me wish we could re-do another room!

Shortly after finishing the Teacher Lounge, Rob and I re-did our room and finally got new furniture to replace the bedroom furniture Rob had used since the fifth grade! I still love my furniture!

February is Kolby's birthday month and it feels like it takes the whole month to get all the celebrations in! She had a big skating party and we were so excited when good friends Jonathan, Jackson, and Susan came in to surprise her from Arkansas! It was in the last days of February that the word dyslexia started to swirl around Kolby. I was left dizzy and down by the whole thought of my daughter having any type of disorder.

March brought a big fat rebate from th tax man, and an unforgettable trip to San Antonio and Sea World over Spring break! Rhett and Kolby rediscovered their love affair with hotels and I rediscovered the River Walk! Great times and great memories!

Don't remember much about April, but who could forget May ...Episode III! We had so much fun with Star Wars this year. Starting in May our premiere party on Rob's birthday and continuing through Rhett's birthday in September until the launch of the DVD in November we were all about using the Force. It has been so fun to share our love for this series with our kids and to find ourselves being kids once again! For us 2005 will always be the year of the Jedi.

Summer 2005 was one for the record books as far as the heat and lack of rain went, but we managed to have a great time anyway! Highlights were our trip to Palestine, Texas with my parents and sister, our Fort Worth Friends reunion in Fort Worth in July, our trip to Arkansas and Kolby and Rhetts first airplane flight, and Kolby being incredibly blessed to attend Camp Success at Baylor for seven weeks.

I can't say enough about Camp Success. I think it saved the confidence and love of learning in my little girl. In a mere seven intense weeks Kolby's reading improved an entire grade level. By the time August rolled around she was able to start school exactly on the level where she needed to be! Can I ever thank God enough for the wonderful people who fund and operate this camp? Though Kolby still goes to Baylor for tutoring 4 hours a week, after Camp Success we knew that she would be able to overcome this disorder and flourish!

August. School started. We love Kolby's teacher and then Rhett's Mothers Day Out teachers. September we had a big Star Wars celebration for Rhett's bithday. Can one ever have to many Star Wars parties in one year? I have had more time to myself since August than I have had in 7 years, but I seem to fill that time up! Teacher Appreciation has taken more time than I ever thought. I enjoy what I do but I am going to have to curb my PTA time to get ready for this baby!

So let's skip to November and the huge surprise that awaited me On the 7th!!! I was in the middle of the "Teacher Prom" and feeling like I was coming down with the flu. Only after calling my doctors office about getting a flu shot or maybe something stronger did I realize that I couldn't remember my last cycle. Took the test. Almost fell out of my chair when the little PLUS sign appeared. WOW!!!

So here we are. I am almost 12 weeks along and the shock and awe still haven't worn off. (Although the nausea has slowly begun to lift= HALLELUJAH!) Where are we going to put this baby? How are we going to afford another one? Will I be able to do everything I did for Kolby and Rhett for this baby at age 36? I have 6 years of scrapbooks to catch up on before this baby is born! I have four closets to clean out and magically combine into three to make room for this baby. We don't have a carseat, a stroller, bedding, or a swing. I have to think about carrying a daiper bag again and buying daipers ... and then there is the whole breastfeeding thing ...OH MY GOSH! What are we doing????? We're having a baby!

Still, I can't wait to find out what this baby is! (AND WE WILL BE FINDING OUT!) I can't wait to see Kolby's expression the first time she holds her new sibling! I can't wait for Rhett to finally be "a big Brother!" I am so excited to have a baby in Waco with my whole family at the hospital waiting to welcome the new one! I can't wait to see Rob change that first diaper again and act all goofy making faces. I can't wait until I can actually feel that little baby growing inside of me kick and turn somersaults like my other two did! I start to tear up when I think about holding a tiny little baby fresh from heaven, with tiny little finger and toes and looking into those little eyes knowing I am the mother of this little miracle! Is there anything as sweet and precious as a baby? Thank you so much God for giving us this last chance at having a baby!

I guess all the ups and downs of 2005 and the great anticipation of 2006 have taught me one basic lesson over and over again. God is faithful. (I loved what Jon Owen had to say about this a few days ago.) In the good and in the bad, he is faithful. When I am weak or when I am strong, he is faithful. In times of doubt, in times of faith, he is faithful. Through heartbreak and terrible darkness he is faithful. Through joys and overwhelming love and light, he is faithful. At all times the name of the Lord should be praised. He is faithful.

May I always remember to praise him in all situations in 2006! Happy New Year!!!!!

Glory, Glory, Jalopeno.... Rosa's has come to Waco!

Warning: Most of you will not get why I am so excited about this...but if you grew up in San Angelo, Texas you will know exactly why Rob and I are so pumped.

As I recall, it all started in San Angelo in a little joint that used to be a burger stand on Bryant Blvd. not to far from Central High School. That's where the first Rosa's Cafe & Tortilla Factory was born. I ate many a meal there with my family was thrilled when Rosa's 2 opened on our side of town. They had the best tortillas, the best beans & cheese and the best queso fajitas... In High School I would go with friends to "the old one" for lunch. Most days we would get the Bobcat Special which included three piping hot tortillas, a half pint of beans and cheese, and a medium drink for $1.85! Heaven in a tortilla! And sooo good when your school had off campus lunch and you had a $2 a day lunch allowance!

Fast forward ten years. My family "did" Rosa's at least once a week and kept a stash of tortillas in the house most times in between. My friend and I each lost 10 pounds on a Rosa's chicken fajita fueled diet during that time! When Rob and I were dating we ate at Rosa's in Angelo and Odessa, as a man named Bobby Cox had bought the Rosa's by our house in Angelo and then opened one in Midland and another in Odessa.

Almost five years ago Rosa's came to Fort Worth. The one on Precint Line and Grapevine Highway saw our little family (and all the friends we could convince to go with us) very often. Kolby was hooked immediately and again I felt so at home. Rosa's and Maccaroni Grill were two of the places we hated to leave behind when we moved to Waco.

Fast forward to today. There are now 29 Rosa's. They opened five new ones this year and hope to open ten more next year. All Rosa's have that magic tortilla machine where you can watch the workers put little balls of dough in and, as they slowly spiral down past gas fueled flames, they become the best tortillas ever! Though the menu isn't as economical as it once was, you can still get 8 hot sopapillas for under $2.00 and fajitas for four for $20.00.

We tried the Waco Rosa's tonight for the first time. I feel like a little piece of my past has moved to Waco. We chatted with Mr. Cox and saw some familiar faces. We heard plans for future expansions and were assured there would be no short cuts and no microwaves in any Rosa's. We also learned that the only Rosa's Cafe's not a part of the current growing chain are the original ones in San Angelo. They are still owned and operated by a family there, though not the original family. I wonder if they still have the Bobcat Special? No matter! I am happy to have a little bite of "home" so close by.

Welcome to Waco Rosa's! It's great to get reaquainted with an old friend!

And for those not blessed enough to live close to a Rosa's... just wait! If Mr. Cox has his way, there will soon be one opening near you!

A Merry Little Christmas

We had a very merry little Christmas and I hope you did too! Here are some of the highlights.

Mama K & Papa gave Kolby and Rhett a trampoline! They have spent hours jumping each day and have even perfected a few flips!

We had our traditional Christmas Eve meal of enchiladas & tamales and did "the Christmas Tree" with my parents and sister on Saturday night.

Though I could not eat a bite of anything without turning green and running for the restroom, everyone else loved it all and we had a great time. Kolby told me earlier in the week that she didn't think she would help put out Santas cookies, but when the time came she was all about the cookies, milk and tomatoes for the reindeer! I guess she couldn't bare to not believe at least one more year! :) Santa delivered as usual!

Christmas morning my big family all met up at my parents for family church since our church didn't have a service that morning. I love having church on Christmas morning! It was a really neat thing for us and for the kids. When I was a little girl we used to have family church often during the holidays and at family reunions. I have great memories of my whole big family sitting around singing hyms and "having church." I hope our family will start doing this more when we have the occasion! We topped the day off with a huge Christmas Dinner (aka Thanksgiving part 2) and lots of games, talk and play. A good timewas had by all, and we all slept very well that night!


Monday Rob's folks came down and we had Christmas with them. Rhett and Kolby were sad not to see their cousin Drake but were thrilled to see Granma and Grandpa's little fur person, Muffin! We loved having them here. Rhett cried and cried when they left!

Rob is off this week from L-3 but has basketball games almost every day or night. The kids and I went to see Lion, Witch & The Wardrobe yesterday. We actually planned to see Chicken Little but it had moved on, so Kolby and Rhett talked me into Narnia. I still think Rhett was too young. He burried his head in my lap for a good half of the movie but Kolby loved every minute of it. She has talked alot about the differences in the book and the movie. Rhett says now that it really wasn't too scary and told his Daddy all about Aslan and how he died so that Edmund could stay alive. I guess he got more of it than I realized. CS Lewis really knew how to tell a story!

I have been battling the pukey pregnant thing the whole week but otherwise I feel much better. Probably won't be blogging too regularly until Rob goes back to work on the 2nd or until Kolby and Rhett start back on the 11th, but I hope you all have a great holiday and a very happy and safe NEW YEAR!!!

Merry Christmas!

Like my friend Elizabeth, I think this will be my last pre-Christmas post. I hope all of you have a very Merry Christmas! Wish I could have you all over for a big Christmas Party!

1. Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate? Hot Chocolate!

2. Does Santa wrap presents or just set them under the tree? Unwrapped, unpackaged, and fully assembled with a big red bow on top!

3. Colored lights on tree/house or white? White on both.

4. Do you hang mistletoe? Would if I had some, but never have.

5. When do you put your decorations up? Ideally, the day after Thanksgiving, but it's usually at least a week long process.

6. What is your favorite holiday dish (excluding dessert)? Sausage balls, Sweet & Hot over Cream Cheese with Wheat Thins and White ChocolateChristmas tree pretzels with M&M ornaments!

7. Favorite Holiday memory as a child? Going to Coleman or Waco or whereever the whole family was gathering, opening presents on Christmas Eve, sleeping on the couch bed with my cousins while telling stories and scratching backs!.

8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa? I don't remember if I ever truly bought into the whole Santa thing and that makes me sad. My mother didn't want to lie to me so she always just said Santa was a symbol of all the good will and generosity in Christmas.

9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve? We open them all on Christmas Eve but what Santa brings the next morning. We usually do this after a Mexican food feast of tamales or enchiladas, while sipping hot chocolate and listening to Christmas music. maybe that is why as a child I loved Christmas Eve more than Christmas Day!

10. What kind of cookies does Santa get set out for him? Whatever is in the house...some years he gets pretzels. Kolby insists on putting out tomatoes for the reindeer.

11. Snow! Love it or Dread it? Love it! But this is Texas!

12. Can you ice skate? I could 16 years ago but I'm not sure about now!

13. Do you remember your favorite gift? Several! An Atari one year. A private phone line in my room with WHY-STEF (949-7833) as the phone number another year. When I was really little I got the Donny & Marie playstage and dolls and loved it. In fact, I think I still have it in the attic!!!

14. What's the most important thing about the Holidays for you? Being thankful, being together, giving.

15. What is your favorite Holiday Dessert? Pumkin Chiffon Pie

16. What is your favorite holiday tradition? I used to love to go carroling when I was young and hope to do that with my kids one of these years. I love to drive around and look at lights with my family. I also love turning out all the lights in the house but the Christmas Tree and the fire place fire, reading from the "book of Christmas," listening to Christmas musi, and snuggling!

17. What tops your tree? A Gold star that Rob and I bought on our honeymoon from the Holland store at Epcot. I love this star.It is one of my favorite Christmas decorations!

18. Which do you prefer Giving or Receiving? Giving

19. What is your favorite Christmas Carol? this moment? This one on the net is cute. I love the Celine Dion Christmas Album! But my favorite carol is any one that my kids sing when they don't know I am listening!

20. Candy Canes! Yuck or Yum? Rhett loves big candy canes and somehow started a tradition of putting them all over our Christmas tree! Kolby and I like the little ones that we can dissolve in our hot chocolate... Yum!

The trouble with blogs

I just read an article about a young man who is now on his way to prison because he confessed to causing an accident on his blog. Wow! I guess that is bad for him but maybe good for man kind? So this post is a random disscussion on the value of blogging.

You know I love blogs but I admit they can get you into trouble. I recently commented on our preachers blog and evidentally ruffled a few feathers. I have friends who have been put out at snide little comments left on their blogs, and rightly so.

So I am wondering AGAIN for about the 1000th time this year, is blogging worth it? I read Mike Copes blog every morning like most people read the newspaper and it starts my day out right. Mike is the kind of guy who can be inspirational when he isn't trying. Even the "guacamole" posts seem to get the juices flowing. But there are very few Mike Copes in the world.

I love keeping up with friends on blogs. I love meeting new friends on blogs. I love getting cool ideas or great recipes from blog world. I love seeing peoples pictures and hearing their stories. I even like to read the occasional well founded,not too crazy "rant" because it makes me feel like I'm not alone. I love blogs that talk about the struggles and triumphs of life in Christ. I love "mommy" blogs and "family" blogs.

Then there are blogs I avoid. I stay away from blogs that tear and tear at one type of religion, or one type of political party. I'm not into "the world is going to hell in a hand basket" or "I'm so messed up and depressed" blogs. My least favorite blogs are "we are right and you are wrong religious blogs". While I love blogs of thanksgiving, blogs that are full of bragging and "my life is so perfect" make me want to hurl. Val recently talked about many blogs being "ego trips"(...so hope he wasn't talking about me!) and I have thought about that alot.

So I have rambled on for several paragraphs and not really made much of a statement here...So I'll ask the three or four of you who read this, what do you think about blogs? What does blogging do for you? Is it worth it? Just wondering?

Stephanie Secret #1

I wore a Christmas Sweater to my daughters Christmas Party at school today and loved every minute of it! Don't call the fashion police on me...please!

Happy Birthday Susan!

Today one of my favorite people in the world celebrates her birthday! Susan Jenkins is another year older according to the calendar, but she is one of those young souls who never seems to age. A few years ago we lived in Fort Worth together. At first she was just a friend of a friend. Then somehow those friends moved and Susan and I found each other quickly becoming best friends. Funny how friendships grow that way.

I have often said I would never have survived my pregnancy with Rhett if it weren't for Susan. She put up with all my drama queen moments and we had so much fun together! Then me moved to Waco, and a year or so later they moved to Arkansas. But still I consider Susan one of my best friends. She is one of the first people I call when I have news, good, bad or just "juicy". My kids think of her and her kids as relatives and Rhett claims he is going to move to Arkansas when he grows up and live by his best buddy Jackson. Kolby used to say she would marry Jonathan but now that she is older and gets more of what that means she just says they will good friends and go to movies together! : ) And Mark and Rob...Well they are always so busy working we don't see them much!

My life is much richer because of my sweet friend Susan. I for one am very glad she was born ALL those years ago! Happy Birthday Susan! : )

PS I have not left my house since last Friday so your card in the mail will be a bit late!

36

I just keep saying it over and over in my mind thinking if I keep saying it, it will eventually seem real.

36.

I don't feel 36. But as of today, I am.
Not that 36 is bad. I've always liked the number 6. Ages 6, 16, and 26 were good to me, so I am sure 36 will be great too! I have that cold/flu/sinus funk again so this is a pretty quiet birthday. Rob and I had planned to go to Austin and eat at The Cheesecake Factory but I was just as happy to stay here and order in Chinese food.

And for those wondering... The cake this year was not Red Velvet! ; ) Mom took the kids to by TCBY and picked up a White Chocolate Mouse Cake for last nights early birthday dinner. Today I slept late, crawled out of bed to eat a bowl of soup and am currently contemplating getting dressed in something other than Pajamas so we can go out to eat tonight. Pretty easy day. Even sick, birthdays are good days!

To Find Out, or Not To Find Out?

That is the question of the day.

Baby number three and we still can't agree on whether we should find out if it is a girl or boy or wait for the surprise. With Kolby we did not want to find out. With Rhett I alone found out at about 32 weeks and kept the secret. (I was having some post miscarriage bonding jitters and the doctor thought knowing the sex might help me think of the baby as real and viable...Which it did!)

So here we are at number three. I want to know. I feel like I need to know. I don't care boy or girl, but I want to know.

Rob doesn't want to know. Not sure of all of his reasons, he just wants it to be a surprise like the others.

What to do?

I do not want to have to keep the secret again. I just couldn't. I really want to find out so I can plan, paint, get bedding, rearrange the house to fit the baby in etc. But, Rob is steadfast in his not wanting to know.

So I'm putting it out there for discussion. What do you guys think? Help me sway my husband or help him sway me....

Christmas Program at Church

This weekend was our church Christmas Program. Rhett was in the Reindeer review.
Kolby was part of the chorus for "A Shepherd's Story" and was part of a little trio for part of one song.
It was so good! We had so much fun watching them. I am very grateful to the volunteers who worked so hard to put this show together. It is such a great thing for our kids. Thanks Jan, Dana, Martha Kate, Amy, Kim, Robin, and Stephanie P. for all your hard work! You ladies are wonderful!!

Not much to blog about these days. We are a bit sick in our house. Kolby has had a virus and missed school yesterday and I have a cold/flu something or other. Of course this is the week of another big teacher event at school. Why is it that I get sick the week of a big event? It is only by the grace of God and the power of Sudafed that I am able to get out of bed every morning! I'm really ready to feel better.

Only 12 more days until Christmas! Can you believe it? Who ever made up the term "slow as Christmas" must not have been a Mom. Every year the holidays seem to go by faster than the year before. Does it ever slow down? Would I know what to do if it did? The house is finally decorated and the Christmas Cards sent out. Now as for the shopping, baking etc. .... Well that is a whole different story!

Must go blow my nose and make the next "to do" list!

Happy Holidays

(Soap Box Warning)

There. I said it. HAPPY HOLIDAYS!
HA! Does saying it make me less Christian?
Does it mean I am trying to take the Christ out of Christmas? Does it mean I think Christians shouldn't celebrate Christmas as a religious holiday? Do those two words mean I have turned by back on my heritage and taken a dive into the great cultural melting pot where nothing is sacred and individualism is lost? NO, I think not. It means I am ever so nicely wishing you a happy holiday season.

I have heard so much hype these days about President Bush sending out a Christmas Card that said "Happy Holidays" instead of "Merry Christmas." I'm tired of the protestors trying to sue and boycott Target for asking their employees to use a greeting that would be appropriate for all their customers instead of just the Christians. I'm aggitated by parents calling and threatening my child's public elementary school with legal action if the Winter Break notice isn't reissued because it said "Happy Holidays" instead of "Merry Christmas!"

When I say Happy Holidays I mean Merry Christmas and Happy New Years at the same time! If you are Jewish, I wish you a Happy Hanukah. If you do the Kwanza thing...Well Happy Kwanza!. HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

If "Happy Holidays" is on my Christmas cards it means that is the wording that came with the background from the Wal-mart photo center that best went with my kids cute picture. It could also mean that I may not be able to pull my head away from the toilet long enough to get my Christmas cards mailed before Christmas, so I'm saying "Happy Holidays" just in case you don't get it until New Years, or at this rate maybe even Valentine's Day! With Happy Holidays, all my bases are covered.

Last I checked, America is a place where no one can stop me from saying "Merry Christmas" as my own personal greeting. America is also a place where I should not be made to say "Merry Christmas" and branded as being "at war with Christmas" if I say "Happy Holidays." Seriously people!

There is a Sunday school song that almost sarcastically plays in my mind when I see Christians making such a major deal over such a minor thing..."And they'll know we are Christians by our love, by our love, yes they'll know we are Christians by our love."

If we want to keep the Christ in Christmas we need to worry more what our actions say and less what our greeting cards say. We need to show the love and compassion of Christ to those who truly need it. We need to give sacrificially and love our neighbors. We need to establish good and honest characters in our communities, as well as reputations as people who care about people, not the ones suing each other over greeting cards.

Sorry to be so edgy and opinionated today guys. Maybe it is the hormones talking, but this whole subject just really irks me! SO HAPPY HOLIDAYS! And have a very MERRY CHRISTMAS while you're at it! :)!

Party of Five

I have been writing this entry in my head for several weeks and am thrilled to share our news with you... We are having a baby! Shocked and surprised? Well we definitely were! But we are thrilled beyond words.

I found out almost a month ago but waited to tell you guys because my first doctor's appointment two weeks ago showed that I was three weeks behind where I thought I should be. ( I really had no idea of my dates and was just guessing.) After having a few miscarriages, any thing developmentally behind worries me. But we went today and saw a little peanut with a heart beat! Everything looks great and the doctor said I should expect a normal "boring" pregnancy! YEAH!

The kids have known for two weeks also and are so excited. Kolby talks about it all the time and quizzes me on eating healthy for baby. She has even told me to go to bed a few nights "because the baby needs lots of rest." She is so sweet! Of course Rhett wants it to be a boy (named "Brett" by the way :) and Kolby wants a girl. But Kolby said the other day she wouldn't mind another brother as long as it is a healthy baby.

Rob and I really don't care if it's a boy or girl. At first I was leaning towards wanting a girl, but I think a boy would be fun too because I have never been around brothers and my boy stuff is the newer stuff... Of course I still have a few cartons of baby girl clothes saved from Kolby that are stinking cute... So as long as it is a healthy baby I truly don't care girl or boy.

One of the most fun and exciting things about being pregnant this time around is sharing it with Kolby and Rhett. Kolby was only 3 1/2 when Rhett was born so I don't think she really got it. But she will be 8 1/2 (the age I was when my sister was born) when this baby is born and she is so into babies!

As I said, Rob and I are thrilled but I'm not sure it has sunk in yet. I am going to be 40 with a 3 1/2 year old!!!! WOW! We have also joked about this being financial suicide, loosing the guest room, and not having any baby stuff left over because I got rid of most of it when we decided we were done... But really, all that talk pales in comparison to the excitement and gratitude we feel. I always wanted more than two children even though we said we were done, so this is just the biggest blessing! I am so happy to know that I get to feel a little baby growing inside me one last time.

We all plan to enjoy every second of this pregnancy! Even the sickness, which I have been battling! But it is different this time because each time I puke I think that that is just a sign that my hormones are doing exactly what they need to do for the baby and I am actually grateful. Happy to be puking... CRAZY!!! I know!

Today we got a due date of July 22, 2006. So even though it is way early in the game, I wanted to go ahead and share this good news with all of you. I would appreciate your prayers for this baby and this pregnancy. I am just so excited and happy about this all! I'm sure I will be gushing about it for months, so I will stop now.

We're having a baby!

Address Change

If you are my friend and I do not have your address and you want a Christmas Card from me...please e-mail me your address. If you have moved in the last year and e-mailed your new address to me already...do it again please. ;) Thank you ever so much! Still working on that list of things I have to do before I blog!

Breakfast with Santa

No, I still am not done with the list of things I said I would do before I blogged again, but I'm getting closer! We had a busy and fun weekend.

My Mom and I took the kids to Breakfast with Santa sponsored by the Waco Historic Foundation.
It was much more than just breakfast. (Kolby is in a pink stage and refused to wear the traditional red! What a diva!)
We saw many friends there and my Mom and I even got to shop a little bit.

There were lots and lots of fun things for the kids to do. Rhett loved the sports, the construstion site, and the SLIDE!!! That's Rhett coming down behind Kolby...he wouldn't pause long enough for a picture. I bet they went down this thing for thirty minutes solid!


Kolby loved having her hair braided and her face painted. She also liked making candy cane reindeer and listening to the singers.

We were there for 5 hours!

The one down note came as we were leaving and a "reindeer" (really a donkey in disguise) bit Rhett on the arm. It bled and bruised and Rhett screamed for an hour. I was so glad to be able to tell him that it was a donkey so that he would not be afraid of Santa bringing reindeer on the house come Christmas Eve! Little did I consider what this might make him think of live nativity scenes!

Blogatizers

I'm not letting myself blog until my house is decorated for Christmas, all the Halloween and Thanksgiving stuff is securely in the attic, the laundry is done, and the house is "company" clean. : ( I may be offline for a while! It's good to have a goal, right?

In the event that you don't hear from me (do you actually "hear" from me if I post and you read it?) for a few days, I want everyone to post their favorite appetizer recipe here. I will post mine in comments later but I thought I would try to get some new recipes because everything we are invited to this season is a "bring an Appetizer" type thing. I can only make sausage balls so many times in a month! Please give me feedback! And stay tuned for that Sausage Ball Recipe!

Omelets in a Bag

I got this recipe in an e-mail from Susan a few weeks ago and did this with the kids this morning. It was really fun AND both kids tried things in their omelets they never would have tried before (green pepper, diced tomatoes, ham. Etc) . The omelets were perfect! I may never make omelets any other way. Instructions are below if you want to try this with your family. Be sure to use freezer bags and to squeeze the air out of the top. (I heard of a messy situation that occurred when a friend didn't read that part!)

OMELETS IN A BAG
Good for when all your family is together and no one has to wait for their special omelet. Have guests write their name on a quart-size freezer bag with permanent marker. Crack 2 eggs (large or extra-large) into the bag (not more than 2) shake to combine them. Put out a variety of ingredients such as: cheeses, ham, onion, green pepper, tomato, hash browns, salsa, butter etc. Each guest adds prepared ingredients of choice to their bag and shake, Make sure to get the air out of the bag and zip it up. Place the bags into rolling, boiling water for exactly 13 minutes. You can usually cook 6-8 omelets in a large pot. For more, make another pot of boiling water. Open the bags and the omelet will roll out easily. Be prepared for everyone to be amazed.
Can be made with 4 egg whites or with corresponding measurements of egg substitute.

Thankful

I am thankful for...

...My healthy strong husband who works so hard and loves us so completely

...My children who amaze me everyday with their creativity and ever developing personalities. There is no doubt a great God in control who allowed these precious little people to come from Rob and me!

...Our parents who support us 100 % with all their hearts in everything we do. I can't imagine our lives without them and I don't want to have to!

... My sweet sister who will not be here tomorrow because she is having the time of her life in San Francisco. Sari had a hard year last year, but she truly loves her life right now and I am so very happy for her. I am thankful God has taken care of her with plans only he could know! She is such a blessings to us!

... My extended family. Moving to Waco seemed easy because of our family here. There are things we miss about our independent metro-plex life, but we would not trade back! For the past four years my big family has been the source of much joy and laughter. We have demolished many a restaurant together! :) We take up an entire section at church. Like me, my kids think of their cousins as their best friends. They all have several adults they trust and love around to turn to if Rob and I aren't there. I am very blessed to be related to these people and their incredible spouses. God has been so good to us!

... My friendships. Can you imagine life with out friends who share the core values of your life? God has blessed and provided me with so many great friends at church, in our neighborhood, in the community, in Rob's work, from both Kolby's and Rhett's schools, from our past, even from blog world (:) You guys are my cheering squad and I love you all!) and in every area of my life. For as far back as I can remember God has surrounded me with good friends who had incredible impacts on my life. If I am half the friend you all are to me, then you know how much I love and appreciate you !

... My church family. I don't always appreciate this body as I should. Since we moved here I have met some incredible people who love my kids and love and support each other in a way that only church can. We are blessed to be part of Crestview.

...Most of all I am thankful for God's love and faithfulness. I am ashamed to think of all the times I haven't said thank you to him when I should have. Is there an hour that goes by that he does not provide for or bless me? I am thankful for his grace and his unconditional care. I am thankful that he is faithful. I can never thank him enough!!!

I hope and pray that you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving and that we enjoy an attitude of gratitude through out the year! God bless you and HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!

Beautiful Weekend

I was lucky enough to spend a good part of Saturday and Sunday out side with two of my most favorite things overhead, trees and a beautiful clouded sky! I love trees. I long to live in a house surrounded by tall old trees like this one. Is there anythng more beautiful than a tall tree? We have two medium size young liveoaks in the back yard that have tripled in size since we moved here almost 4 years ago. They are nowhere near the tree above , but I hope they will be someday. Don't laugh when I say I pray for them and thank God for them, because I do! We also have two in the front that have not grown an inch n three years...I pray for them too! Someday I will have big trees!

On Sunday there must have been a weak front blow through because the sky was so blue and the clouds were so pretty. We had a West Texas sky! I never realized how pretty the sky is in West Texas ( San Angelo in particular) until I moved away. But now every once in a great while Waco is treated to a sky like we had today! BEAUTIFUL!

Trees and a beautiful sky... Doesn't take much to please me!

We had a fun weekend. The kids and I went to a fun "Camping Birthday Party"on Saturday then played on the play ground near the party site for a long time after the party was over. Sunday we returned to the scene to see some friends and take some pictures. We also snagged another hour on the playground.
It was the type of weekend I live for... very fun and very relaxed!

SOCCER PICTURES

If you came here looking for BLUE JAY Soccer pictures, email me here or through my profile, and I will get them to you!

He's Always Been Faithful

Yesterday I shared a situation Rob and I are facing with a friend. I'll share that situation at a later date, but today, sort of in response, my friend sent me a recording of "He's Always Been Faithful." Beautiful song!

I listened to it with my eyes closed and found myself weeping by the end. Not weeping for my situation, but weeping because I lack faith so often. These words struck me especially hard

I can't remember a trial or a pain
He did not recycle to bring me gain.
I can't remember one single regret in serving
God only and trusting his hand
All I have need of his hand will provide.
He's always been faithful to me.

I have a really wonderful life and I am so blessed with family, friends, and love. God has never left me. Why do I so easily loose sight of this when there is a bump in the road, or a hair-pin curve that I can't see around? You would think by now that I would have learned to trust God enough not to freak at the little or even the big chills and spills in life.

But it is hard sometimes isn't it? I have been thinking a lot lately of a young recently widowed mother I know. I wonder how long it will be before she can sing this song with any conviction? I want God to take away her pain but I'm not sure I have faith that he will.

I want my God to be big enough and strong enough to withstand all the whys of this world. I want him to heal all hurts. I want God to be a God I understand and can explain. And while in retrospect I thank my lucky stars for the "problems and challenges" in my life and praise God for all the great things he is done for me, something about my trust in him falters when I see others who love him so much in so much pain.

About the time all my "Why God?"s crescendo, he whispers "I am God. You are not. Trust me my beloved child. Trust me with your life and the lives of those you love. I am God. Whether you get it or not, I will take care of everything!"

Then comes the next part of the song...

This is my anthem, this is my song,
The theme of the stories I've heard for so long.
God has been faithful, he will be again.
His loving compassion, it knows no end.
All I have need of his hand will provide.
He's always been faithful to me.

So that is faith. That is the walk. That is the struggle. That is the victory.... Believing he will when everything around you screams he won't.

I don't know where you are today. I don't know what God has put on your heart. I have no idea if this will mean anything to anyone but me. But a friend shared his heart today and it touched mine. God spoke to me in the words of a song I have sung a thousand times, calming fears I didn't even realize were impeding my faith. I hope sharing this will help someone else out there.

God is good and He is faithful!
Amen!

What did you do today?

I made a cake.

Tonight we're having a small shower for my cousin and I wanted to make the cake. It was not too hard to make and gave me the excuse to stay home today. I relish days where I am home all day...They seem so rare! I'm looking forward to some good girl time tonight.

Sorry I have been off line lately. I'm almost over that virus/sinus/throat stuff I have had. (This would be day 9 if you are keeping track.) It's nice to be able to recognize my own voice again. :)

Busy Busy Busy! That is all we seem to be these days.

So how was your day?

A Groovy Kind of Lunch

It is over!!!!
We had a great time. Our husbands were great. The food was great. The volunteers were great. I may talk about it more later but right now I am too pooped! Thought I would post some pictures. I don't think I was meant to be a blond!

Decor

GROOVY GUYS

K

First Grade
Table

A cure for bloggers block

DJG didn't tag me, but since I am having a bit of bloggers block, I thought I would try this.
The rules:
1. Delve into your blog archive.
2. Find your 23rd post (or closest to).
3. Find the fifth sentence (or closest to).
4. Post the text of the sentence in your blog along with these instructions. Ponder it for meaning, subtext or hidden agendas.
5. Tag five people to do the same.

From 7-24-2004 "Anger, furor, hate, tearing others down, and jealousy, these are the products of not forgiving."

One of my deeper blog posts, I guess. I was talking about the Anne Lamont quote "Not forgiving is like drinking rat poison and waiting for the rat to die." I think the sentence speaks for it's self. I think I was implying that these "fruits", not exactly fruits of the spirit mind you, are what I see in my life when I hang on to anger and don't forgive.

I remember this entry was a response to reading other blogs on the same topic. I realized that I was holding on to some hurt I didn't even recognize as that, and as a result damamged some relationships in my life. I am a cautious person once I get burned. It is hard for me to trust again and let go of past hurts. But that is so hypocritical of me becasue heaven knows I have done my share of hurting others whether intentionally or not. It is hard to put yourself out there again after a deep hurt. But what is the alternative? Never putting your self out there again? Who is that going to hurtin the end? So I guess my point then and now is I have to forgive and put myself out there if I am to enjoy all God has planned for me. Getting hurt is just part of life. To truly embrace life however we have to decide what parts of it we want to hold on to. Any sorrow or pain we hold is taking the place of possible joy. So I must let it go, forgive and do not let myself be fearful.

As I said one of my deeper blogs.

Anyone else having bloggers block is welcome to do the same.

Strep from the net/ The ugly little voice

Last week I read that fellow bloggers Elizabeth and Jacinda (I finally added her link to my blog list this week!) were down with strep throat. Today I find myself down with the same thing. While I did talk to Elizabeth on the phone a few times, I never saw her face to face and Jacinda lives a couple 1000 miles away!!! Can you get Strep from the web? I am beginning to wonder! It is much more likely that I got it from one of the three kids who I was in contact with that came down with strep. Luckily none of those three were my kids! I am keeping my fingers crossed that I will be the only one in this house who gets it.

I'm not sure it could come at a worse time. This is a big week for me. My friend and I are in charge of the big appreciation luncheon (aka "The Teacher Prom") at Kolby's school this Thursday. We have been talking about it and planning for it for over six months. It's a big event that involves busing the teachers to a local church fellowship hall that has been transformed in to an incredible theme decorated luncheon hall.

There are about 70 teachers and staff who come to this. We feed them, give them door prizes and treats, have a fun activity or two, take their pictures in front of pretty elaborate back drops, and then two hours later bus them back to school. My guest bedroom and garage are full of 70's stuff. I'm really excited about it, but hoping I feel better soon enough to finish the dozens of last minute things that can not be done until, well, the last minute.

Our theme this year is "A Groovy kind of Lunch." Outback is catereing it. The big decorations are made. Everything is ordered and most of the 40 to 50 volunteers it takes to watch all the classes at school and serve are lined up. AND WE EVEN DID ALL THIS AND CAME IN UNDER BUDGET!!! I think it will be great...or at least I am hoping it will be.

Will I ever outgrow that secret panic that no matter how hard I work or how many plans I make, my event will totally flop? Have I ever had an event flop? Not treally. Will the teachers love anything that involves free Outback and a 2 hour break from the school? Most definitly! So why do I still listen to that nagging little voice? The strep throat seems to be giving the voice a mega phone today!

Any of you have experience with that ugly voice that whispers that you can't do it and somehow you forgot something big? What do you do to shut it up? Just wondering....

Live

Live. And Live Well.
BREATHE. Breathe in and Breathe deeply.
Be PRESENT. Do not be past. Do not be future. Be now.
On a crystal clear, breezy 70 degree day, roll down the windows and FEEL the wind against your skin. Feel the warmth of the sun.
If you run, then allow those first few breaths on a cool Autumn day to FREEZE your lungs and do not just be alarmed, be ALIVE.
Get knee-deep in a novel and LOSE track of time.
If you bike, pedal HARD… and if you crash then crash well.
Feel the SATISFACTION of a job well done—a paper well-written, a project thoroughly completed, a play well-performed.
If you must wipe the snot from your 3-year old’s nose, don’t be disgusted if the Kleenex didn’t catch it all… because soon he’ll be wiping his own.
If you’ve recently experienced loss, then GRIEVE. And Grieve well.
At the table with friends and family, LAUGH. If you’re eating and laughing at the same time, then might as well laugh until you puke.
And if you eat, then SMELL. The aromas are not impediments to your day. Steak on the grill, coffee beans freshly ground, cookies in the oven.
And TASTE.
Taste every ounce of flavor.
Taste every ounce of friendship.
Taste every ounce of Life.
Because-it-is-most-definitely-a-Gift.

Words to live by, but not my words. These words are from the message Kyle Lake typed out and had ready to deliver the morning he tragically died. That was just one week ago tomorrow.

Kyle Lake (pictured here ) never said these words to his congregation that morning, but he lived them everyday of his life. It is a little eerie. I wonder as he typed these words if he had any inkling that he was typing his own eulogy? But can you think of a better eulogy? No one has to wonder what Kyle would have wanted. His loved ones know how he wanted them to live and to grieve. "Grieve well" he said. And so many are doing just that.

I'm sorry if my blog has been a little heavy with this over the last few days. Though I only knew the Lakes through my sister and mutual kid activities and friends, I can't seem to shake the sorrow, loss, and amazement at the life and death of this young pastor.

With each passing day it becomes clearer and clearer who this man of God was and how many lives he touched. To say he will be missed is quite an understatement. The best any of us can do is heed his words to live and love God with a great gratitude that his death won't stop the message he pledged his life to spread.

You served your Savior and all of us so well. May you commune with the Father and breathe in the sweetness of heaven Kyle Lake! May we all "Love God, embrace beauty and live life to the fullest!"

Highlights of our Halloween

After sharing the sadness of the last few days with you, I wanted to share all the fun things that have been happening too!

K won one of the awards for 2nd grade with her "Princess and the Pea" literary Pumpkin. She was so excited. "This is my first ever win in a contest Mom!" she squealed when I picked her up from school. I admit we were all very happy and proud. But I would have hated to judge this! It was one of the most creative contest I have ever seen! K's school librarian thought it up and had over 100 entries. You can see all the winners here (click on "our web sites", "Library", "Library events", "pumkin contest"). Ms Judy would be so proud! In other Halloween news... This is the year of the JEDI!

Can you tell we like Star Wars? The big cousins had a great time as usual. We had two Anikins, two Padme Amadalas (different dress though) one Lea, and a fairy.

The newest little members of our tribe, Kt & S3. Sweet babies!

Rt dueling with fellow star wars fans down the street. These guys were great! They dressed up and put on a show every ten minutes the whole night. When Rt saw them he turned his saber on and ran to join the battle. Rob an I laughed and laughed seeing him really try to get these big guys with his Jedi moves.

Our Neighborhood really gets into trick-or-treating! It is so fun to go to all the decorated houses. Nothing too scary...Just really fun. I love this night!

Life goes on

Friday night I couldn't sleep and ended up watching a PBS show about women who have immigrated to the US seeking asylum. The show was none to spectacular but it showcased some pretty amazing women. One women told her story of coming to the US from Iran when her country transitioned through the last Shaw. She came here pregnant to live with her mother and sister, but her husband was detained and later executed in Iran.

When her sister came to tell her the news of her husbands death, she was holding and feeding her infant son. She said what struck her hardest after hearing the awful news, was that she still had to feed her son. She wanted to run away and hide and cry and throw things, but her son had to be fed and no one else could do it. The baby had no way of understanding the news his mother had just received. He was just sweet, innocent and hungry. At that moment she realized that even though her world had been shattered and the love of her life was gone, her life had to go on. The baby still had to be fed. That part of her story really stuck with me.

Life does go on no matter how much we wish it would stop for the tragedies in our life. My heart and mind have been so heavy for the loss of Kyle Lake and for the painful road that is now laid out for his sweet family. Sometimes it is hard to shake a sadness so deep, even if it is not your own.

I found myself tearing up at the silliest things yesterday. But it was Halloween and my sweet little 4 year old wanted to make cookies with me. We had planned it all day. So we started. Rhett looked up at me with those blue eyes and spoke beyond his four years saying "You don't seem very happy Mommy. Don't you like to make cookies with me?" I assured him that I loved making cookies with him but that I was still sad about Sari's friend. He gave me that blank look and said "But you have to be happy today because we get to trick or treat tonight." And he was right.
Life goes on.

I am to the age that knowing life goes on no matter what somehow seems almost more comforting than cruel. I thank God that Jennifer Lake has three children who love and need her so that she will have to go on despite her broken heart. I am really glad that my sister has a new job that is going to take her to Boston for several weeks so that she has to move on, though her heart is heavy with this loss. I praise God that Kyle Lake left the kind of legacy that his church will not let die. In his memory and because he was so committed to bringing people to the love of Jesus, they will have to move past this horrible tragedy and try to carry on what he started. Though it will never ever be the same, life will go on.

Dearest Father God, Thank you so much for making life go on, even when we don't want it to. Please give us the strength and hope to brave the battles of this world until we can all be home with you. Please wrap your arms around the Lake and UBC families as they bury their beloved Kyle today. Please take care of Jenn, Avery, Sutton and Jude and fill their broken hearts with your healing love. Help us all to go on joyfully proclaiming your peace and joy to all who know us. And please father bring us home soon. Amen.

According to Sari, Kyle ended every message with these words "This week may you love God, embrace beauty, and live life to the fullest." A charge to keep.

P.S. The national news media may not pick this up but they found out that Kyle's death had nothing to do with the microphone. The water pump in the baptistry was running and it had shorted. When Kyle touched the metal side of the baptistry or the microphone poll, he grounded the current. That is what killed him. Not the battery powered microphone.

New DVD out today

Just in case you missed it, there is a new DVD out today. I think a few in my family have already made their purchases and it isn't even noon yet!!!