Potty Talk

For too long I put off my urge to blog about this. I just can't hold it any longer, I've got to let loose, and let it flow... RHETT DOES NOT GET POTTY TRAINING!!!

Here is the deal. Kolby was potty trained at 2 1/2 by her patient teachers and peers at preschool. I didn't have to do much. One day she wanted to wear pull-ups to school like her friends (she was the youngest in her class). Two weeks later she had graduated to big girl panties. Except for the occasional hiding in the closet to poop(yes, she did and, no, we don't know why), it was an easy process. Painless. Clean. And after I accidentally flushed a pair of her new Winnie the Pooh panties down the toilet after a poop closet incident, we didn't have those incidents anymore. (accidental parenting success, very rare but much appreciated.) By three Kolby was diaper free completely.

Rhett turned three last month and is FAR,FAR, AWAY from being diaper free. We started talking about the potty around age two. My Mom bought him a special potty at two and a half. I bought all the potty videos. We sing all the potty songs. ( "Now I'm going to the Poootty potty!" is a household top ten!) We have tried sticker charts, skittles, M&M's, ten times in a row for a new Thomas, "all the other kids are doing it", targets (girls don't get this), and just putting him in underoo's and letting the chips fall where they may. (They fell on my off-white carpet!) None of this has really worked. Rhett does it for a time or two and then decides he likes diapers better. We have tried to be subtle in our attempts, awarding success and ignoring failure. But he is three for crying out loud!

Yesterday I found myself saying "Rhett don't those soggy diapers feel yucky?"
"Nope"
" What about that stinky poop, wouldn't you rather put it in the potty?"
"Nope"
He could care less really.

Last night I pondered this scatological* problem. Since it's my blog, and you've read this far, here's what I came up with...(Feel free to add any suggestions or your own observations.)

1. Walking around with sloshey dirty pants doesn't bother Rhett because that is all he has ever known. For three years he has worn diapers. He is used to the soggy feel and pungent smells. Why would it bother him now? It's all he knows.

2. When you have been potty trained for 32 years, it is really hard to relate to someone who isn't. To me, his whole potty thing seems relatively simple. I am right and he needs to get with the program. It takes a concentrated effort for me to relate to my un-trained son. BUT telling Rhett that his poop stinks and berating him for going in his diaper will only alienate and insult him. He will not be any closer to being potty trained. To reach the goal I have to help him decide it's worth it.

3. I can not make Rhett go to the potty. I can bribe, instruct, applaud and aid, but I can not do it for him. Wish I could, but it is one of those learning things that involves free will. My job is to introduce him to the concept, and move heaven and earth to help him "hold it and go potty" until he gets it. Once he gets it, he has to do the rest Then my job is to be an enabler (it isn't a negative thing when your are enabling good), an encourager and an example.

I concluded that as long as he can change his own pull-up by Kindergarten, he'll probably be OK. He is the oldest in his class. Soon peer pressure will be on my side. (another thing that can be positve) He will probably get it the minute I give up.

Aside from my parental conclusions about Rhett, I'm sure you see the comparisons that could be drawn here between Potty Training and church.

1. The lost of this world can not always fathom God. A redeemerless life may be all they know. They may have to see God in someone else to realize what they are missing.

2. When you grow up in a churched atmosphere, it may take a strong concentrated effort to relate to those who didn't. Salvation may seem like a no brainer, but it is not a concept we naturally accept. Telling some one their sin is awful and berating them for not knowing God will only alienate and insult and bring them no closer to the Father.

3 And the last, Jesus saves souls, we do not. It is our job to introduce them to the Savior, move heaven and earth to show them His love, and to encourage, enable and set an example. But they have to make the decision. That stinking free will again!

God says he makes his ways known. My children have taught me more about grace, joy and God than any encounter of my post-teen life. How patient God must be with us! His love and loyalty are just baffling.

Potty talking about God. Never know what to expect on this blog !
Blessing!

*Yes, I learned this word on the boone box.